First of all, this word of the day ain't gonna cut it anymore. It takes far too many days for me to even start actually typing into my laptop for this blog, would I not have many other things to do besides school and work and everything I do when not being busy with those two tasks. Since there are only 26 letters in the alphabet (at least in the English one, might as well start a different alphabet when finished this one and still want to write about letters and stuff), and since it's only one letter per time, I'm gonna cheat and write about three words of the day. Actually it's going to be four words of today -one not even starting with a "s"- as the English don't use the great ability that Dutch people do use -and Germans are a bit too fond of-, to put any random amount of every possible word together, and form another new word. No, instead they just leave a stupid space between them and force me to get irritated by the fact that now my words don't all start with the same letter. Of course I could have just chosen different words, but that's not going to happen. Just not.
Second paragraph. (No kidding?) Ok, let's start talking about stilettos. You know, those pointy things people claim you can't walk on, those awfully high tapering (here meaning having a gradual decrease in thickness) things called shoes? Yeah those. I happen to love them, and although I don't own as much shoes as I would want, could afford, or need to have, I cherish them. For all the girls reading this, I think most of you will understand what I'm saying here, if not for the high heels than for the love of shoes no matter which form (kidding, some shoes are just unacceptable) or colour (same goes here). Heck, if you're not into shoes -which is practically impossible (I first was, but after a while you just can't remember the times they weren't fun to buy and wear)- maybe you're into dresses, skirts, purses, computers, games, whatever. Any girl -or woman, boy, man for that matter- has at least one thing they really enjoy buying or wearing or using or whatever (out of interest in thinking of more words).
For all the boys reading this, just accept we are like this, it's not gonna change. No matter how hard you try to understand. Tough luck and go enjoy your own highly unlogical (just as unlogical as ours ^-^) passions, whatever it may be.
Next thing, studying. Now why would I bring this unearthly word and act of complete boredom and perhaps actual smartness up? Well, simply because it starts with the correct letter and because that great (for all you all too literal people (seriously, start having fun with stuff like metaphors or something), I don't have any sarcasm font but trust me, if I had one such thing I would have used it right now) activity is what I should have been doing today and speaking of it, probably even the past week. Luckily, I know myself just about good enough to be able to tell whether studying is going to work for me, and believe me when I say the answer to that is no (at least in 99.8% of the cases). So I decided to enjoy life some bit more, watch some movies/series, listen to some music and just leave the studying to the last day, in which I of course still do practically nothing but hey, at least I revised the practising question and looked at some neurology pages!.. Sounds as good as it's ever gonna get so the big test tomorrow better not be impossibly difficult or I will regret my obvious decision of typing this all instead of acquiring academic knowledge at an educational establishment. (sounds a bit too fancy for what I'm supposed to do but all right, not going to argue with the dictionary there)
Last thing on the menu, is a split personality, specially marinated, stuffed with two of the finest and most exotic dishes on the entire globe, arrogance and modesty. As people who know me personally can easily tell, I'm not always the same person. As people who don't really know in person, just go with it or read my "about me" or do nothing, I don't really care about that anyhow, after all it's your choice.
Anyway, to be sure about things, I'm not talking about the psychiatric diagnosis of any disorder or something, I just thought the phrase split personality kinda was the most clear. In the past few weeks, I've been thinking more than normal about my actions in life and what I want from life, where I want to be in 10 or 20 years, etc etc etc. I've come to the obvious conclusion that I don't know. I just don't know at all. Probably more than half of the worlds population can agree with what I just said, but hey, who am I to disagree? It's only quite difficult and irritating when there are exactly two halfs of me, wanting the exact opposite of what the other half wants. I'm arrogant, I can be a bitch and can literally tell myself that no one else matters because they are simply not good enough. On the other hand, I'm sensitive, I can be sweet as hell (or should I say heaven?), and can at the same time convince myself that everyone on this planet deserves the best, simply because they do.
Now I'm not saying that I sometimes feel slightly more to the left, and then slightly more to the right. No, I'm actually both of those people -or mes or whatever I should call it (gosh, I'm not very good at synonyms etc today am I?)- all the time, and at the same time. Just exactly the same as my goals in life. I want to travel as much as I want, yet I choose to study for a career partly in the Dutch language, which means I won't leave this country. I want a massive amount of houses, mansions and villas. I want to live in the forest with only a couple of basic things to life on. I'm messed up, and right now I don't even know why. I used to know why. Thoughts anyone? ;)
Okay, I think this is enough for today. I'm off to other stuff on the internet, last minute studying and hoping tomorrows test will be a stroke of luck.